Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
