yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize