you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
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