Christians are straight up FREAKS
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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