Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
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I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
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I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
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