you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
