Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
His nipple licking is glorious
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