Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
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