In the future we'll all be gay
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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