I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize