fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
