I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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