We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
