whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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