Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Randomize
