Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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