Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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