these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
