This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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