So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
