i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
