idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
