I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
