Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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