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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it

  (586): View more from Michigan

  We did he did.

  (586): View more from Michigan

  When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.

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  25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  ...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.

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• (252): View more from North Carolina

  My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.

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  25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.

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