roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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