Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
