i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
