Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
wanna go halves on a baby?
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
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