I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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