how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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