I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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