Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
