I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
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So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
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I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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