You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I think your dad took our porno
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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