I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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