Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
