NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Drunk is not a location!
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
