y did u give ur computer a hand job?
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize