After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
