well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
