youre lurking in front of me
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
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