too bad you live with your parents still
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
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