i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Randomize
