shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
