69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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