my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Randomize
