so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize