The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
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When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
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He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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