Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I just forgot I was standing up.
I think people are normalizing furries
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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