i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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