What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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